Teaser

I have a friend (Yeah, really!) who always posts a single word post on Facebook and waits to see how many people comment on it. Ten minutes later, if no one has commented she’ll go and open up the topic.

What’s that got to do with anything?  Absobloodylutely sod all.

It’s just that I haven’t got anything to write about and that’s all I could think of – and as it always says in the ‘how to’s’ you should just start to write so here I am.

Apologies in advance for the disjointed drivel that you’ve just read and for that to follow. It’s not even as though nothing has happened this week – loads has happened, just not things that I think are appropriate to share on here. Mostly because it’s been the crap week from hell and since I’m positive thinking at the moment I don’t want to dwell on it. To be honest, the only thing I’m feeling positive about today is that I’m completely and utterly naffed off, tired, emotional and drained. Douggie the doggie having a fit in the early hours of this morning didn’t help matters much. I’ll resume my attitude of gratitude tomorrow.

So. Day off today.

It’s tough being a florist’s assistant. It’s also super busy at this time of year. I went from helping to make a Christmas arrangement to helping to make a coffin top arrangement to Facebooking and updating the website, all in the space of an hour yesterday.  So much for retirement. It’s so busy I’m  working up to and including Christmas Eve.

That brings me nicely to the season of goodwill.

I popped over to have a gander at Manchestercflickchick’s blog, as is my wont. Good blog, go and take a look, say I sent you. Imagine my delight when I read a whole post dedicated to Christmas. Yay! It was one of those nominate jobbies but she didn’t nominate me. I was gutted.  Anyway, God loves those who help themselves – so I helped myself to a nomination and Here it is: my Christmas themed self indulgence fest.

Let’s talk about me…….

Favourite festive food: Where to start? Bring it all on. Christmas morning croissants and champagne at bezzie mates. Christmas dinner with ALL the trimmings, Christmas pudding. Yup. I love it all. I don’t even mind doing all the cooking. If I have a lot of people to cook for then that means that I have all my favourite people around me. What’s not to love? This year I’m going a little bit away from our traditional smoked salmon for a starter and going with beef carpaccio, also known as food of the Gods or manna from heaven.  Nomnomnomnomnomnom. I feel a bit sick now 😦

Favourite Christmas drink: Can I have two? Advocaat should be made compulsory at Christmas and then banned for the rest of the year. Christmas just isn’t Christmas without thick, gloopy, weirdly tasting advocaat mixed with dry ginger. Then there’s the Christmas sherry. I quite like a nice dry sherry. I wouldn’t normally drink it but when I do I can’t stop myself from saying in a shrill voice at regular intervals, “More sherry, vicar?” as I hold out my glass for a refill.

Favourite reindeer: Hhhmm. It has got to be Rudolph as the rest of them are a set of two faced, laughing, name calling  bitches. I hate bullies.

Favourite day of Christmas: All of them, starting in mid December.  In the last week I have foraged a tree from the garden to paint and decorate with icicles and snowflakes, I’ve foraged twigs and ivy to make a Christmas tree. Tomorrow I’ll be making my table decorations from leylandii and wine bottles. Christmas is a crafter’s dream! I  love the run up to it, I love the excitement, the gift buying and wrapping, the cooking, the visiting, the chaos, the giving and receiving of gifts, the meaning of Christmas. I’m not a church goer now but have some very deep seated beliefs, which is why I get so pissed off when people get all politically correct and start referring to it as ‘the holidays’. It’s a Christian celebration. Christ – mas, the clue is in the name. Got it? *catches rant before it starts*  I suppose my favourite day has to be the day itself but only by a whisker.  Did I mention I love it?

Favourite Christmas song: Easy peasy. It’s the one Douggie the doggie and me danced to at the dog club party last year. Louis Armstrong’s Zat you Santa Clause? I can’t help but smile when I hear it and Louis Armstrong has a special little place in my heart anyway.

Favourite Christmas present: Another easy one. Although I’ve had many, many brilliant presents over the years, the one that springs to mind is the Sindy doll I got as a little girl. It was in the days before that long legged and big boobed American imposter, barbie really caught on here. I loved my Sindy doll and was distraught when my little brother pulled her head off on Boxing Day.

Favourite Christmas film: Ok, ok, I know I’m supposed to say “It’s a Wonderful Life’ but it aint. It’s Elf. Ok? There, I said it in public.

Favourite Christmas tv advert: It’s caused a lot of controversy but I love the Sainsbury’s advert about the first world war ceasefire on Christmas day. I wonder how many people realise that it’s a true story? It makes me cry every time I see it.

Favourite Christmas decoration:  As my daughter can tell you, I fall in love with anything rustic. My absolute favourite decoration is a rustic fairy dressed in brown and gold with long golden hair….Oh. But then there’s my collection of Father Christmas’s I love all of them, tricky to choose.  This year’s favourite? My big balls. Haha. Oo-er missus! I bought some giant balls for the tree. Every tree needs giant balls. Doesn’t that just paint a great picture in your head?

Favourite festive tradition: Well, every year follows pretty much the same routine. Brekkie with bezzie, drinks at Len’s mum and dad’s, everyone round to ours for pressies and dinner. That’s the way I like it so I have to say my favourite tradition is all of it!  Don’t even get me started on why anyone would go for a curry on Christmas day. That’s just bizarre. One year we went to a restaurant for Christmas dinner. It snowed, it was beautiful, there was lovely music, no bickering, the atmosphere was brilliant, the meal was so much better than I could have cooked. It was all wrong, wrong, wrong. Christmas should be at home with the family.  Which brings me to….

Place to spend Christmas: See above.

So there it is, my perfect Christmas. If you’re still here, thank you for indulging me. I’m in a much better mood now. Time for a snooze on the settee while I watch Elf again. When you get a minute, why don’t you tell me all about your perfect Christmas?

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6 thoughts on “Teaser”

  1. This made me smile all the way through and giggle quite a bit as well ☺ Your friends and family are so lucky that you love cooking at Christmas and your house is lucky that you are all crafty. You will have to post some piccies. I’m not religious and started calling it Xmas but made it sound rude and shameful in some way so I dropped that very quickly! Merry Christmas! x

    1. Aaaaaw, thanks, Chick (or is it Flick?). I’m now trying to make Xmas sound rude and I’m failing but it’s amusing me trying 😀

  2. My perfect Christmas would involve being 7 years old again. I can still remember my excitement at the thought of getting a Sindy doll and outfits to dress her in.
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from me, Millie and Pearl. 🙂

    1. Sindy was the epitome of glamour to me as a child, I spent many an hour in my Sindy fantasy land 😀

      Merry Christmas to you too, Annabelle – and of course to the girls.

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