This week alone we have had no internet which is a bit of a blow when your diary and booking system is all on online.
We’ve had no phone. Useful when you’re running a business.
Also, terrifyingly, we discovered we had no insurance cover. We’d put in a claim for a tv and it was overturned. It seems that due to an item in the small print we’d actually not been covered for weeks. OMFG!!!!
Thank God it was only a tv we’d claimed for and not a major claim. I’m not sure if it was some sort of celestial joke that caused the fire alarms to go off that day for no reason but I can tell you that I nearly dropped dead of fright right there on the spot.
You’ll be glad to know that it’s all sorted out now. I fucking hate insurance companies!
We had a gas leak, that was fun.
It’s a good job I clean behind the cooker at ridiculously regular intervals or it could all have been very nasty. While I was on the floor cleaning the pipes on ‘clean behind the cooker Monday’ which also turned into ‘clean behind the cooker Tuesday’ because I’d slopped food around that day. I heard hissing and noticed bubbles where the soapy water had touched the hole in the pipe.
The plumber was duly called who said he’ d come the following day. “The following day?!?” ” Can you smell gas?” he enquired.
Well, no but…. “well it’s not gas then. It’ll be fine. Turns out it was gas and a bad one at that. The gas board’s emergency number was called and the genius gas man spent a good two hours fixing it while I made contingency plans about how to feed 26 people with no hob or oven to cook with.
While all that was going on we also had guests keeping drugs in their room. Boofuls had to have a word with them. Even he was a bit surprised when they said they’d store it at the parent’s house.
Electrical equipment has been falling over and dying like flies. We have about six vacuum cleaners and not one of them works properly. It makes vacuuming ginormous bedrooms a bit of a pain to be honest.
Poor old Boofuls has spent far too much time this week holding, fixing and re-routing cables trying to make the tv in room 14 work.
We completely ran out of bedding as the laundry has consistently failed to return our linen to us. At one point they’d lost 20 double duvet covers. We suggested to them that we use their contract linen until they find our lost linen and they agreed to deliver it all the following day. Guess what? Yup. No linen. We couldn’t make up a single matching bed set. Sigh. They turned up two days later at 8.45 this morning while we were serving breakfast. They couldn’t have picked a worse time to turn up. The driver just smirked when I voiced my discontent. I could have hit him round the head with a frying pan!
It’s not all doom and gloom though. The breakfast order tickets coming into the kitchen often make me laugh out loud when I see the various abbreviations Lashes uses.
Generally we have B=bacon, E=egg, Be= beans, you get the idea, all very straight forward. The perfect breakfast is a FE, full English. Seven items, no messing about with fiddly stuff.
Of course it never goes that smoothly. It still makes me titter like a schoolboy when I get a ticket that says Nom Nob. Can you guess what it means? This week we also had a Nom Not Nob. Teehee. Then of course we got the cryptic ticket which blew my brain.
Lashes had written:
FE – no HB/M/Be
OK. EBTS that’s easy, it’s egg, bacon, tomato,sausage
Next breakfast: I stared and stared at the ticket and the two plates. It wouldn’t compute. FE without hash browns, mushrooms and beans. This shouldn’t be so difficult, get it together woman!
OH!I’VE GOT IT!
FE no hb/m/be is EXACTLY the same breakfast as EBTS!!! Oh my God! Write it the same way, woman! I was so confused!
On Tuesday we decided to have Prosecco Tuesday after we’d finished cleaning the rooms. Our little chambermaid can’t believe her luck! She’s never worked anywhere that has prosecco after work.
It’s not a bad old life, really.