Social Whirl and Family Ties

Wow! Our feet haven’t touched the ground in the last week or so.

Visitors from up country have been replaced by more visitors from up country to be replaced by yet more visitors from up country.

Yeah? So? You own a B&B I can hear you saying.

Very true, we do. Paying guests coming and going is one thing. Personal guests coming and going is so much more exhausting!

Don’t think this is a complaint. It’s been absolutely lovely having friends and family coming to stay. Especially my brother who hasn’t been before.

It’s fair to say we have a bit of a precarious relationship with him and his wife so I wanted everything to be absolutely perfect.

I fretted.

Would they like the room? Shall we eat in or eat out? If we eat out what kind of restaurant are they going to want, I didn’t want to insult him by going to the cheapest place in town or put him in a difficult position by going to an expensive restaurant. How much time were we expected to spend with them? Were we supposed to spend all day or just part of the day. I didn’t want him thinking we were hijacking their holiday or ignoring them when they wanted to spend time with us. What about breakfast? Shall I offer them the works or simplify it as they were the only people here. Shall we eat with them or treat them as paying guests and wait on them hand and foot?

You get the idea. There wasn’t a single aspect of their stay I didn’t fret about.

It was very stressful.

They brought their six year old granddaughter with them and she made everything so much easier. She and Munki got on like a house on fire so they had a whale of a time and you know what they say…happy kids = happy adults.

I know you’re dying to ask me, how was it then?

It was brilliant. I suspect we were all a little bit tense, and trying that much harder to make it work. And it worked! We ate out (carvery, wins every time!), we laughed, we chatted we indulged the kids. What we didn’t really do was rake over old ground or bring up our tumultuous past. It went so well that they are talking about coming down again in October!

I haven’t always had the best relationship with my brother and his wife for all sorts of reasons. I have often felt like I have lost both of my brothers, my younger brother died three years ago.

I was thrilled a few months ago when I discovered that he quietly follows me on Facebook, he rarely comments on anything but I know he’s there and taking an interest and that is massive. I always thought he really wasn’t interested in my life.  Knowing that, and having had the last few days has rebuilt our relationship a little bit and I couldn’t be happier about it.

Roll on October !

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6 thoughts on “Social Whirl and Family Ties”

      1. Aye . . . and I think that will happen this year. At least we’ve got 30 years of reconciliation behind us. Can you imagine how shabby I would be feeling right now if not for that?

      2. Oh God! I’m so sorry. That just kind of proves my point, doesn’t it? I have a friend who has had a massive falling out with her sister, try as she might she cannot reconcile things with her. The sister’s final hurtful deed is to have had written into her funeral instrutions that her sister is not to be admitted to the funeral. I think that is just so sad.

        Enjoy every minute you can with the time you have left with your brother. I’m so pleased you managed to save your relationship with him.

      3. Perhaps these two experiences will be a dinner conversation with your brother on his next visit. Some kind of ice-breaker, wake-up call, whatever. It’s an ill wind that brings no good, innit?

        I see my bro’ every couple of weeks, as his energy is very low and visits can deplete him further. I’m a practical person, so my solution is to cook. He can’t digest much. Zucchini slice is well received at the moment, and it takes a little load off his wife. Calorie laden soups and bite-sized meatballs of various types have also gone over okay. Pork and veal mince goes down easier than beef.

        Okay, I’m rambling now . . . .

      4. Ramble away m’dear. You know, you are lucky that you are in a position to make life a little bit more pleasant for him and his wife during his last days. Those are some precious memories. Not only that but by having rebuilt your relationship you will have no reason to harbour any guilt after he’s gone. YOu’ve done everything a good sister could and should. I don’t know why we always find something to feel guilty about but we do (by ‘we’, I mean me).

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