We recently shot a wedding at a gorgeous castle. The setting was spectacular. The parking was dire. I had to lug two large camera bags, a reflector and a tripod, all in one hand, a quarter of a mile uphill in blazing hot sunshine from the nearest car park while shoving a dry turkey sandwich into my mouth with the other hand. It has to be dry due to my propensity for slopping any kind of food down my front – it has to be able to bounce of my ample bosom without making a mark when I’m working, hence the dry to the point of feeling like I was eating wood, sandwich.
Anyway, back to the plot. The castle was amazing, what a fantastic backdrop to the wedding. There was pathos, sentiment and drama in equal measure, I so wish I could tell you all about it but it would be unprofessional of me. All I can say is that it would have made a brilliant episode in a soap opera.
After the ceremony, the plan was to photograph the group shots and the bride and groom in the castle grounds. Perfect. Except the bride and groom were smokers and the rules say that smoking can only take place outside the castle walls so they kept buggering off outside. Add that to the fact that we were only at the castle for less than two hours and the family drama which took up a large proportion of the time, and the end result is a photographer tearing her hair out as she tried jolly folks along and round them up for the photographs they would undoubtedly complain they didn’t have if I hadn’t managed to get them.
A photographer’s lot is not always a happy one. let’s not even talk about the dog portrait last weekend when the ridiculously huge German Shepherd seemed awfully keen to take Boofuls’ face off.
Eventually, I managed to round up the family and got a few shots. As the happy couple were leaving in their car I thought it would be nice to get a shot of the car going down the drive with the brightly sunlit castle in the background. Click, click, click, I rattled off half a dozen shots, knowing that I’d have to do some photoshop tweaking as bright sunlight and dark shiny cars are a tricky combination to work with.
One of the staff from the castle, well, I say staff, judging by his haughty manner he might well have been the Lord himself for all I know, snotty bastid, came over to me.
“Let me see those shots”, he demanded. I showed him the shots. “Bit of a white balance problem going on there.”
At that point I knew I was dealing with a tit as his comment was totally off beam. He went on..
“Did you shoot the whole wedding with your camera on auto?”
I was affronted. “No, I happen to have a degree in photography.”
“Really?” was his reply.
I was shocked, upset and very angry after our short exchange. What I did to upset this chap who I hadn’t even clapped eyes on till this point I have no idea but I’d obviously done something to offend him.
So there we are. I’d been so excited about working at this lovely venue and in the end it was stressful, difficult and I got insulted into the bargain.
Like I said, a photographer’s lot is not always a happy one.