Tag Archives: ship

Carry on Cruising


The days sailed by delightfully slowly. Usually a holiday feels like it ‘s gone in a flash but on this one time seemed to slow down and I was glad because I was enjoying every minute of it.

Maybe not every single minute. I didn’t enjoy it much in Lisbon when I was overcome by the heat and had to take refuge in a cafe, pale faced, shaking and near to tears.  Even that turned out ok though as we had a brilliant meal of the freshest grilled fish and salad while we sat in the cool airconditioned, characterful surroundings regaining our (my ) equilibrium.

Where did we go then?

Vigo first. What a pretty place.  Boofuls was thrilled to see segways for hire at the dock and wasted no time at all in securing us a couple to go and see the sights on. I was so glad he did, all the stuff we wanted to see was at the top of a stupidly large hill!

We had a laugh with one of the ships photographers and gave him a photo shoot to relieve the tedium of endless mug shots.

We loved it, I think it shows us as we really are, elegant and sophisticated. It’ll pop up on the slide show in a minute, what do you think?

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We made loads of new friends on the ship. People we wouldn’t engage with in real life became bezzie mates. The young couple dressed in head to toe Gucci with the Armani sunglasses that never left their heads be  it day or night, sunny or cloudy turned out to be really good company. They were begging us to go clubbing with them one night. Clubbing. Dear God, it’s been a while since we did that!

Then there was the mother and daughter combo. What a laugh they were. The driest humour ever, just how I like it. What these four people had in common was that they all thought I must be related to Fern Britten as I apparently look and act just like her. What do you think?

Source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2009/mar/25/fern-britton-leave-this-morning

Me

 

Yeah, that’s what I thought, both female, middle aged and blonde, that’s where the similarities end.

Obviously one of our first stops when we got on board was to check out the dance  facilities, which were I must say pretty dire. The teachers were far from dire though and we got on like a house on fire. Bad influence, they are.  Keeping us up till all hours,  I’m not saying we danced a lot or anything but my dance shoes actually fell apart! It was the after hours socialising that really took it out of me, I was exhausted!!

Coming back through the Bay of Biscay was entertaining.

Literally 50% of the  crew and passengers went down with sea sickness. In fairness it was a bit choppy. At one point a huge wave hit the side of the ship and scared the life out of everyone, causing one woman who’d been hanging over the side trying to keep hold of her lunch to get soaked and lose the lunch battle simultaneously. After that we weren’t allowed outside on the lower decks.

Boofuls and me were blissfully unaffected. We’d booked a table at the outdoor grill restaurant and we had the best service, EVER. Mostly because we were the only people there.

It was a bit like Carry On Cruising at this point, which amused me greatly.
The ship bounced around. The water from the swimming pool would occasionally shoot ten feet up into the air.  The waiters were staggering around with trays of food. The wine kept sloshing out of the glasses.  People tried to walk across the lido deck but got beaten back by the wind. Inside,the dance floor was downright dangerous but  it did create a bit of comic action as we watched some people  give  a waltz  their best shot.

Back in the cabin the wooden hangers in the wardrobe were clanging together and sounded  just like chinese music. The drawers in the cabin kept flying open.  It ket me awake  most of the night chuckling to myself as I played out a Carry On Cruising scenario in my head.

Cue scene Our heroine phones the captain: “Ere captain, me drawers keep coming open and me ‘angers keep banging together.”

(Cue Frankie Howerd type eye rolling.)

Captain:  ‘Ooohh Missus, we don’t want any of that filth round ‘ere, thank you.’

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